Itâs pretty easy to get disturbed by what appears to be âthe world falling apart.â We can become obsessed by fear and judgment, especially if we often tune into our favorite cable news shows.
Hereâs some really GOOD ADVICE from Richard Rohr, an American spiritual writer and Franciscanfriar based in Albuquerque, New Mexico.
“If you will allow, I recommend for your spiritual practice for the next four months that you impose a moratorium on exactly how much news you are subject toâhopefully not more than an hour a day of television, social media, internet news, magazine and newspaper commentary, and/or political discussions.
“It will only tear you apart and pull you into the dualistic world of opinion and counter-opinion, not Divine Truth, which is always found in a bigger place.
“Instead, I suggest that you use this time for some form of public service, volunteerism, mystical reading from the masters, prayerâor, preferably, all of the above.
âYou have much to gain now and nothing to lose. Nothing at all. And the worldâwith you as a stable centerâhas nothing to lose. And everything to gain.”
When I follow Rohrâs advice, Iâm far more peaceful and loving toward others because Iâm not riled up by events I canât control. Give it a try and let me know how it works!
Gigi Langer has been sober 34 years, and holds a PhD in Psychological Studies in Education from Stanford University. Formerly crowned the âQueen of Worry,â Gigi resigned her post many years ago and now lives happily in SW Florida with her husband, Peter and her cat, Murphy.
In Worry Less Now, Gigi shares her personal journey as a prisoner of fear, worry, and substance abuse, along with practical techniques anyone can use. Award-winner with rave reviews. Amazon rating: 4.8 stars. Order it for $10.75 per copy , free USA shipping & workbook HERE. Offer ends Jan 1., 2021
Looking for inspiration and release from worry in these challenging times? Feeling a conflict between your human instincts and your divine spirit? I offer you two beautiful passages that clarify the temporary nature of struggle, and our higher power’s healing presence through it all–even during Covid!
MY VERY FAVORITE WORDS: “Worry not, my child. All earthly experiences teach only one thing: That you are forever a child of a loving God who punishes you not.”
“We are merely rendering the barriers to love harmless by walking through them together.”
The Human Experience, Part 1
Many years ago, my friend Mo recorded several passages from A Course in Miracles (ACiM); the last one was called âThe Human Experience,â but it did not come from ACiM. Do you know where it’s from?? I posted the first half of it here: A Mystery Quote: âSongs of Plenty and Songs of Want.â Here’s the second half, a true message of hope and trust. I love it so!
The Human Experience, Part 2
“Worry not, my child. All earthly experiences teach only one thing: That you are forever a child of a loving God who punishes you not.
“You’ve elected to learn these lessons so that you can be free. You can’t be free until you have faced, and then walked through, your worst fear. What your worst fear is changes from time to time.
Walking through your worst fear transforms it into an old meaningless fear. Then a new worst fear will come to take its place. Call the fear poverty, rejection, abandonment, loneliness, death, meaninglessness, or helplessness. Walk through them you will, until they are all gone.
“What you forget is that you don’t have to walk through them alone. I am here and will walk through them with you. Trust me, my child. Ask not that any specific burden be lifted. Ask instead for my presence to walk through with you. We are simply rendering the barriers to love harmless by walking through them together.
“The human experience provides all these lessons to all who walk through them. You walk through them with pain and sorrow if you choose to do it alone. Or you walk through them with peace and joy if you take me along.
The whole point of the lessons is to realize that they are dreams. You only see that when you can see from the place beyond the dreams, after you have awakened. Then you sleep again, and another dream will come to take its place, and we will walk through it. And you will awaken again to see the harmlessness of the dream.
“Ask me to guide you. Ask me not to solve what you perceive as your problems. What you perceive as problems are dreams and dreams are not real.
“Practice fearlessness, my child. Turn over all your fears to me. My way will lead you to discover the light which is already within you.
“There is nothing my love for you will not conquer. We have already traveled this path together, and we are at the end. Try to remember, my child, the song of rejoicing we heard when we arrived safely back in the arms of the Father.
“Your mind has wandered from the truth of that memory. You daydream again. The thoughts of the mind are undisciplined but the mind is at home in the heart of God. Only the thoughts drift away for a moment.
“Call to me dear soul. When you call from the part of your heart that knows we are together still, I will be there and you will be here in an instant.
“Peace and joy to you, dear one. Only joy and peace are eternal. All else is illusion. You have been to joy and peace and you do know the truth. Ask me to remember, and I will. Peace. Peace. Peace.”
Connect with God’s Love and Love One Another
Isnât that beautiful? We need not fear because comfort and courage walk with us through every experience–even those that scare our pants off! Perhaps we’re here for this very reason: to render “the barriers to love harmless by walking through them together.” Let this be the message of this holiday season.
Gigi Langer has been sober 34 years, and holds a PhD in Psychological Studies in Education from Stanford University. Formerly crowned the âQueen of Worry,â Gigi resigned her post many years ago and now lives happily in SW Florida with her husband, Peter and her cat, Murphy.
In Worry Less Now, Gigi shares her personal journey as a prisoner of fear, worry, and substance abuse, along with practical techniques anyone can use. Award-winner with rave reviews. Amazon rating: 4.8 stars. Buy signed copy HERE
For years, people told me I was too âthin-skinnedâ or âhigh–maintenance.â When I looked around at others, they didnât seem to take things so personally, or to be bothered by loud noises and bright lights. What was wrong with me? About ten years ago I discovered the answer: Iâm a âhighly sensitive personâ and Iâm NOT alone. Indeed, about 20% of the population shares this trait.
Youâll be happy to hear that these characteristics are quite respected in many societies where the sensitive ones become advisors and sages.
But, in our Western culture, being highly sensitive isnât always understood or valued. Thatâs why some of us so often feel on the outside looking in.
So, if you think you might be a highly sensitive person or have a loved one that is, take the quiz on Aronâs website and check out her blog, âComfort Zone.â
The healthiest path for us sensitive folks is to value who we are and take good care of ourselves.
Self-Care for Highly Sensitive People
If you can relate, here are a few suggestions for self-care.
Reduce your exposure to loud, dramatic input: news programs, social media, argumentative friends/family, etc.
Schedule downtime to rest, meditate, read, and renew after a busy day or after lots of social activity.
Sleep enough, eat well and limit caffeine intake.
Treat yourself to the enjoyment of beauty: take a walk, savor a sunset, etc.
Hang out with loving people who like you exactly the way you are.
Avoid bright lights and loud background noise (if they bother you).
Remind yourself that your sensitivity makes you creative, empathetic, and loving.
If, like me, you are highly sensitive, please share a few of your insights here. Thanks!
In Worry Less Now, Gigi shares her personal journey as a prisoner of fear, worry, and substance abuse, along with practical techniques anyone can use. Award-winner with rave reviews: Amazon 4.8 stars.
Get special offers on the paperback, e-book, and audiobook HERE.
Gigi Langer has been sober 34 years, and holds a PhD in Psychological Studies in Education from Stanford University. Formerly crowned the âQueen of Worry,â Gigi resigned her post many years ago and now lives happily in Michigan with her husband, Peter and her cat, Murphy.
I used to be the “Queen of Worry,” biting my nails and stressing about everything. After I quit drinking, I found I still had a major “thinking” problem. When hardships arose, however, I couldn’t drink them away, so I had to learn other ways to deal with my fears and insecurities.
After several years of challenges and discoveries, I had built up such an effective set of tools that I rarely found myself worrying. In 2011, I grouped these tools into five simple strategies: HP-CPR. You can think of it as “Higher-Powered CPR” for the terrified heart and mind.
HP-CPR
HP-CPR: Honestly claiming a loving Power, we Choose our future and use Growth Practices to get there. Here’s a quick summary, followed by an illustration.
HONESTY: âHereâs whatâs really going on inside me.â Admit that your worrying has kept you stuck in unhappiness.
POWER: âI claim courage and intuitive direction.â Claim a source of positive power to overcome your worries through your mind, spirit, and/or body energy.
CHOICE: âThis is what I want and Iâm going for it!â Choose a new future andcommit to do the necessary work to achieve it.
PRACTICES: âIâm actively connecting with loving power to grow as needed.â Consistently use a variety of tools to dissolve your worries.
RESULTS: “Here it is!” As you gain a peaceful perspective, you will act with wisdom, heal past wounds, repair relationships, and find true happiness.
HP-CPR At Work
One night, my friend Mary called and asked for my advice after meeting the affluent mother of her daughterâs friend. When the woman asked Mary where she lived, Mary didnât want to say she resided in a small apartment with her three children, so she gave a vague answer. After this encounter, Mary began worrying about how she responded.
Honesty: Mary began our conversation by honestly describing the situation and her embarrassment. Together we identified her negative self-talk (whispered lies): âIâm a loser,â and âPeople will only like me if I match their standard of living.â She also admitted that her need to look good in the eyes of others was a long-standing problem.
Power: Mary felt powerless over her negative thinking and past efforts to correct it. By talking with me, a trusted friend, she began to claim the power and courage to overcome her fears. As we talked together over the next few weeks, I encouraged Mary to use prayer and meditation to connect with her source of loving power.
Choice: I asked Mary to write a statement of what she most wanted in her life as if it had already happened. She wrote: âI have freedom from my self-punishing thoughts and my family is economically secure.â She read the statement aloud as often as possible, visualized it as if it were already done, and felt gratitude for the anticipated results.
Practices: Mary used the following growth practicesto overcome her worrisome whispered lies. 1) The Golden Key: Every time she noticed herself worrying, she shifted her thoughts toward any connection she felt with positive power. Because she had a religious affiliation, she chose to focus on God. 2) Gratitude list: Mary wrote a daily list of three things she was grateful for, without repeating any of the items listed.
My conversations with Mary began in January. During the next few months, she met with me, connected with her higher power, affirmed her life choices, and used the suggested tools. She even added some new ones; for example, she increased her participation in a support group.
Results: In March, Mary experienced what she described as âa miracle.â She was freed from her worries and self-judgment; and she found peace with her current living situation. A month later, Mary was offered a lease on a gorgeous three-bedroom home for very low rent. To top it off, just as I was revising this chapter, she called with news about her work promotion with a big pay raise.
Patience, Persistence, and Support
Notice that Maryâs changes did not come all at once. She followed the steps of HP-CPR with patience and determination.
Another of her crucial actions was joining with others. When weâre in the grip of our worries, seeking help is the last thing that occurs to many of us. By connecting with healthy others, however, we can explore questions such as, âHow might I see this differently?â âWhat do I want as an outcome?â or âWhat growth tools might help me?â
How do you overcome your own fears and worries, and who supports your growth with encouragement and wisdom? I’d love to hear your thoughts!
(Excerpt taken from page 6-8 of Gigi Langerâs award-winning book, 50 Ways to Worry Less Now. For another illustration of these steps, see this post.)
Gigi Langer holds a PhD in Psychological Studies in Education from Stanford University. She is a seasoned author and popular speaker who has helped thousands of people improve their lives at home and work. Gigi hasnât had a drug or drink for over 30 years, although she does occasionally overindulge in Ghirardelli chocolate and historical novels.
Gigi’s book, 50 Ways to Worry Less Now has gained rave reviews (4.8 on Amazon) and a publishing award. Get it HERE in paperback, e-book, or audiobook.