According to the Mayo Clinic, people who worry less have better physical health, lower risks of stroke or heart disease, and higher overall survival rates. They also have better emotional health, less depression, more harmonious relationships, and are more equipped to solve lifeâs problems.
We all want such benefits, right? But weâve got to stop worrying so much! FIND YOUR PERSONAL WORRY SCORE AND HELPFUL HINTS BY CLICKING THIS LINK
Recently, I became extremely self-critical because I got âtoo busyâ to pray, meditate, and go to meetings. When I hear that voice whispering its nasty lies, Iâm reminded of how the âMaster-Beaters Clubâ was born.
While having coffee one day, some sober women and I began to share how an internal voice constantly criticized us: We were bad people, couldnât change, or werenât worthy of love or care. In short, our fearful thoughts were beating up on us.
Suddenly, one woman said, âWell, letâs just call ourselves the âmaster-beaters club!” After a raucous laugh, we had already weakened this character flaw by naming it and laughing at it.
Ever since that day, when that self-condemning voice creeps into my head, I can reject it by having a good laugh as I recall our special âclub.â
As I grew in my trust of a Higher Power, I replaced that critical voice with Godâs loving presence, often expressed through human angels (sometimes called âGod-in-skinâ). For example, my sponsor channeled love into me, and then others joined in, bringing me the care I had so desperately sought.
As I grew into my true self, I realized that my security was guaranteed by my wise God-self, and that my self-criticism had melted away. But, if I let up on my self-care, it can still creep in, as it did this morning.
Today, after talking with my sponsor, going to an Alanon meeting, and meditating, that self-beating voice has left. I now feel peaceful, happy, and free. Â
If we stay committed to our emotional and spiritual recovery, we come to believe that we are perfectly loved and fully able to love others. What a gift!
No more “Master-Beating” for me!
QUESTION: How do you stop the voice that sometimes beats you up?
My award-winning book, 50 Ways to Worry Less Now describes how to reject the faulty thinking leading to addiction, dysfunctional relationships, perfectionism, and worry about loved ones. Check out the practical directions, personal stories, and other helpful suggestions. Amazon: 4.8 stars (Buy Discounted Paperback, e-book, OR audiobook HERE)
Gigi Langer has been sober 35 years, and holds a PhD in Psychological Studies in Education from Stanford University. Formerly crowned the âQueen of Worry,â Gigi resigned her post many years ago and now lives happily in Florida with her husband, Peter and her cat Murphy.
DO YOU HAVE FEELINGS THAT JUST CARRY YOU AWAY AND COLOR YOUR WHOLE WORLD GRAY? Don’t worry! Such feelings are often created by fearful thoughts that arenât even true.
SO, HEREâS THE TRUTH: We donât have the means to make people and things exactly as we want them. We just arenât that powerful.
For example, we live in the wreckage of our future (âIts going to be awful!â) or we create âunenforceable rulesâ (âThis should (or should not happenâ). Often, we try to change the past by thinking how it âcould haveâ been better.
Such thoughts are driven by the fear-driven belief that, if we just think long and hard enough, we can protect ourselves (and our loved ones) from pain and harm.
HEREâS THE GOOD NEWS: We can find peace of mind and contentment in the midst of our fearful feelings and thoughts. Why? BECAUSE WE CAN CHOOSE WHAT FILLS OUR MIND.
HOW? Meditation, walks outside, stretching, yoga, prayer, reading or watching inspiring books/movies, 12-step work, spiritual practices, energy work, and thought-correction can all soothe our most difficult feelings. Good healthy friends or counselors really help too.
When we get still and listen to our inner wisdom (or that of another), we receive the comfort of ACCEPTANCE (non-attachment to specific outcomes). Further, we find ways to address those problems that still bother usâIF they are still bothering us (quite often, theyâve shrunken down to nothing!).
NEXT TIME YOUR FEELINGS are having a hissy fit, stand apart from them for a moment to recognize theyâre mostly a result of inaccurate and disturbing thoughts. Then, ask yourself, âWhat healthy actions can I take to soothe my mind and body?â And then, do that!
PLEASE SHARE YOUR FAVORITE WAYS OF SOOTHING UPSET FEELINGS IN THE COMMENTS SECTION. THANKS!!
Gigi Langer has been sober 35 years, and holds a PhD in Psychological Studies in Education from Stanford University. Formerly crowned the âQueen of Worry,â Gigi resigned her post many years ago and now lives happily in Florida with her husband, Peter and her cat Murphy.
My award-winning book, 50 Ways to Worry Less Now describes how to reject the faulty thinking leading to addiction, dysfunctional relationships, perfectionism, and worry about loved ones. Check out the practical directions, personal stories, and other helpful suggestions. Amazon: 4.8 stars (Buy Paperback, e-book, OR audiobook HERE)
REVIEW by Karen Casey, best-selling author of Each Day a New Beginning (Hazelden) âEven though I have been in recovery for more than 4 decades, and didnât think another self-help book would make it to my treasured list, I was wrong. This book is a winner.â
For years, people told me I was too âthin-skinnedâ or âhigh–maintenance.â When I looked around at others, they didnât seem to take things so personally, or to be bothered by loud noises and bright lights. What was wrong with me? About ten years ago I discovered the answer: Iâm a âhighly sensitive personâ and Iâm NOT alone. Indeed, about 20% of the population shares this trait.
Dr. Eileen Aronâs 25 years of research indicates that highly sensitive people:
Youâll be happy to hear that these characteristics are quite respected in many societies where the sensitive ones become advisors and sages.
But, in our Western culture, being highly sensitive isnât always understood or valued. Thatâs why some of us so often feel on the outside looking in.
So, if you think you might be a highly sensitive person or have a loved one that is, take the quiz on Aronâs website and check out her blog, âComfort Zone.â
The healthiest path for us sensitive folks is to value who we are and take good care of ourselves.
If you can relate, here are a few suggestions for self-care.
If, like me, you are highly sensitive, please share a few of your insights here. Thanks!
In Worry Less Now, Gigi shares her personal journey as a prisoner of fear, worry, and substance abuse, along with practical techniques anyone can use. Award-winner with rave reviews: Amazon 4.8 stars.
Get special offers on the paperback, e-book, and audiobook HERE.
Gigi Langer has been sober 34 years, and holds a PhD in Psychological Studies in Education from Stanford University. Formerly crowned the âQueen of Worry,â Gigi resigned her post many years ago and now lives happily in Michigan with her husband, Peter and her cat, Murphy.
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