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Gigi Langer

Worry Less Now!

 Love More Now!

Tag: peace of mind

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My Two BEST Mental Health Videos: Better than Reading ”Worry Less Now” 

I am re-posting these 2020 videos because they contain mental health content not included in my other podcasts. In fact, they summarize the entire Worry Less Now book. So, if you haven’t read it or just want a quick review of many of the strategies, why not set aside an hour or so and check them out!

😔 Did you know people who worry have more heart attacks than others? Find out how to improve your mental health by overcoming negative thinking and other self-defeating patterns such as codependency, perfectionism, stress, anxiety, and relationship failure.

👍 Practical, proven strategies for living a serene life, no matter what is going on! [See special offers below for signed copy of 50 Ways to Worry Less Now]

VIDEO PART 1: ACHIEVING MENTAL HEALTH with Gigi Langer


Click below to watch PART 1 of my explanation of how to overcome worry on the Achieving Mental Health for Real podcast with Robert Adelman. Thanks to Bob for recording these talks. 😘
PS Hope you enjoy my (intrusive?) hand gestures!

Here’s the link in case you want to pass it on https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/otr-achieving-mental-health-for-real/id1485260458?i=1000466127092


VIDEO PART 2: ACHIEVING MENTAL HEALTH with Gigi Langer

And here are five more of the 50 Ways to Worry Less Now.

JUST CLICK HERE https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/otr-achieving-mental-health-for-real/id1485260458?i=1000485373316

REFERENCES FROM THIS EPISODE:

Highly Sensitive Person, Dr Elaine Aron,  www.Hsperson.com

A Course in Miracles (acim.org) Easier to read: Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love; Karen Casey, Daily Meditations to Practice the Course; also Karen Casey, 52 Ways to Practice A Course in Miracles

Radical Forgiveness. Colin Tipping  www.RadicalForgiveness.com

IS It True? The Work, Byron Katie,  www.thework.com

The Golden Key  www.metaphysicspirit.com/books/The%20Golden%20Key%20to%20Prayer.pdf

Self-compassion Kristen Neff    www.selfcompassion.org  She also has a nice guided meditation in Insight Timer App.

Vision Boards: I have an example in this blog
https://gigilanger.com/positive-thinking-work/

gigi langer worry less now

Gigi Langer has been sober 35 years, and holds a PhD in Psychological Studies in Education from Stanford University. Formerly crowned the “Queen of Worry,” Gigi resigned her post many years ago and now lives happily in Florida with her husband, Peter and her cat Easter.

worry less now gigi langer

Gigi’s award-winning book, 50 Ways to Worry Less Now, describes how to correct the faulty thinking leading to addiction, dysfunctional relationships, perfectionism, and worry about loved ones. Check out the practical directions, personal stories, and other helpful growth tools. Amazon: 4.8 stars (Buy Discounted, personally signed Paperback with free Workbook PDF HERE)

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CELEBRATE INDEPENDENCE FROM YOUR WHISPERED LIES!

worry less now

My friends say our worries & fears come from the not-so-helpful “committee in my head.” I call those negative voices “whispered lies.”

For instance, for too many years I believed “If I want to be liked, I must look good.” This whispered lie made me constantly worried about my appearance and behavior.

WHISPERED LIES: EXAMPLES

• “I’ll never have enough money.”

• “I always sabotage my success.”

• “Relationships just don’t work for me.”

• “We could all be happy if only Dad would stop drinking.”

Although many of our whispered lies concern ourselves, they often focus on our children, spouses, friends, or relatives—for instance, the last example about the father’s drinking. Other distressing beliefs involve institutions, as in “If the government would just change this policy, we’d all be better off.”

Even though it might be true that Dad ought to stop drinking or the government should make changes, these events have no control over your own happiness.

CHANGING WHISPERED LIES TO POSITIVE THINKING
You can find peace of mind under any circumstance because you’re in charge of what you think about.

Most of our worries are fueled by false stories installed into our minds long ago, just waiting for opportunities to be confirmed. Wayne Dyer wrote that everything our brain “knows” is based on past experiences. Therefore, when an event resembles—even in a small way—an old painful one, our mind interprets the new event according to the long-standing negative belief.

Since most whispered lies live largely in our unconscious, we’re often unaware of them.

To illustrate the power of my own “negative committee’s” lies, consider why I failed at romantic love so many times during my twenties and thirties. I wanted to believe that love was possible for me, but my past had taught me the lie “I’m not worthy of love.”

This belief lived so strongly in my mind that, even when a man loved me deeply, I couldn’t believe it was true. After several months, I would become convinced that he wasn’t fulfilling my needs. These worries made me so demanding that I soon snuffed out all the happiness and joy of new love. When it ended, I’d tell myself, “I just don’t deserve love!” Until I got honest and started healing my faulty thinking, I had no hope of enjoying a happy relationship.

READ MY BLOGS FOR TOOLS TO DISSOLVE YOUR WHISPERED LIES

(Actually, any of the blogs or videos aim to help usovercome our negative thinking!)

THIS “NO-WORRIES EXERCISE” WILL DISSOLVE YOUR NEGATIVE BELIEFS

FEELINGS ARE NOT FACTS!

THE PUNISHMENT OF PERFECTIONISM

15 Ways to Defeat Overthinking

I’m so grateful for the therapy, recovery, psychological strategies, and spiritual tools that gave me freedom from my false beliefs. As a result I’m a pretty happy camper most days — AND I’ve been happily married for 33 years. So what if it’s my 4th husband??? He’s fabulous!

WHAT ABOUT YOUR OWN WHISPERED LIES?
To learn how to win independence from your own committee’s whispered lies, check out my award-winning book 50 Ways to Worry Less Now.  Available through Amazon (5 stars), and personal signed copy for only $8.95 HERE (Free shipping within USA).

Gigi Langer, PhD has 35 years of sobriety and has helped thousands of people improve their lives at home and at work. She’s written several books for educators, and is a sought-after speaker and workshop leader.  Gigi holds a doctorate in Psychological Studies in Education  and an MA in Psychology, both from Stanford.

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CAN WE GIVE TO OTHERS WHAT WE WANT TO RECEIVE?

give to others worry less now

What do we want? At the most basic level, we all want to be loved. We want to feel safe, accepted and cared for. Many of us spend our entire lives in a headlong search for these basics, only to fail in our quest. Likely, it’s because we’ve had it backwards: We can only receive for ourselves what we give to others.

If we want loving care for ourselves, then why is it so hard to give it to others? One answer: the fearful self (ego) perceives a limited amount of love in the world, and believes if we give it away, we’ll lose it forever. But the opposite is true: in the world of our spiritual selves, love is unlimited; in fact it only grows when we give it away. But so often we don’t.

Resistance to Love

Have you ever found yourself thinking of calling someone, and then withholding it or putting it off? I do. Often! Love’s voice might sound like this: You should call ____; they could use some support. Then ego closes my heart and whispers, You don’t have time, or They don’t really need your call. The excuses proliferate: You might be disturbing them. Why would they want to talk to you anyway?  

What’s up with that? Well, somewhere deep in my shadow, I’m resisting caring for that person, based on something they either did or didn’t do. Or they might remind me of some painful situation, and my fear-filled thoughts get so loud they distract me from taking loving action.

When we give in to such resentments, we unwittingly cut off love for ourselves—the exact thing we’ve been searching for! We just can’t receive what we’re unable to give. (Although, in recovery and spiritual communities, the generous love given to us often melts our resistance.)

Learning to Open Our Hearts

Learning to give and receive love heals the patterns that have sabotaged our past relationships. This journey requires a few commitments: Abstaining from numbing our feelings with romance, food, alcohol, or other mind-altering substances; joining regularly with people who are growing out of self-centered fear and into their open-hearted selves; and finally, doing the work by using many daily tools to replace our negativity with love—for God, ourselves, and everyone else.  

For me, the Twelve Steps, therapy, and my Course in Miracles study groups have totally transformed my life. Although I may sometimes resist my heart’s call to give love, I notice this, ask my higher power to reshape my negative thoughts, and move forward with love and care.

Although it’s a joy to live this way, I must admit, I don’t follow my own advice every minute of every day. For example, I’d rather be writing this than reaching out to my sister. I think I’ll call her now! (I just did, and it was a wonderful conversation!)

When we give open-hearted  love to others, they can offer it to another, who then opens their heart to another, and so on. It’s a beautiful chain of light that begins when we reject our self-centered fear and choose to love instead.

I WOULD LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU:

HOW DO YOU OPEN YOUR HEART TO OTHERS?  WHAT HAS HELPED YOU GIVE AND RECEIVE LOVE?

gigi langer worry less now

Gigi Langer has been sober 35 years, and holds a PhD in Psychological Studies in Education from Stanford University. Formerly crowned the “Queen of Worry,” Gigi resigned her post many years ago and now lives happily in Florida with her husband, Peter and her cat Murphy.

worry less now gigi langer

Gigi’s award-winning book, 50 Ways to Worry Less Now, describes how to correct the faulty thinking leading to addiction, dysfunctional relationships, perfectionism, and worry about loved ones. Check out the practical directions, personal stories, and other helpful growth tools. Amazon: 4.8 stars (Buy Discounted, personally signed Paperback with free Workbook PDF HERE)


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A Week with My Recovery Buddies in Michigan

recovery buddies

Last week I flew to Michigan from my new home in FL to visit my recovery buddies. It was an awesome visit!!

First, what a treat to finally be able to fly and watch the ground fade away into fluffy white clouds (I always sit in the window seat!)

Second, I got to ride the most wonderfully trained horse for 2 hours in the roads and fields northwest of Ann Arbor. Thanks to my dear buddy and her darling daughters for making that happen!

The 3-day Women’s Recovery Retreat on Lake Huron was the highlight of the week. The inspiring and witty Barbara Brownyard* led sessions on Steps 3, 7, and 11.

The Ann Arbor Women’s Group sponsored the retreat to help connect women in recovery and bolster our sobriety. 

I spent the last 2 nights with my closest recovery buddy, my sponsor. When I arrived at her house, exhausted, they fed me a fabulous Mexican dish. As we chatted afterward, I started listing to the left in my chair, and they promptly put me to bed.

The next day we had lunch on Walled Lake with my first sponsor and another dear friend. I fit in a quick dinner with a thriving sponsee, and then topped off the visit with a meeting at my very first home group, St. Paul’s of the Cross. Of course, we had to go out for ice cream after!

Thanks to all my wonderful recovery buddies. You enrich my life and teach me so much. Plus, we have SO much Fun! I treasure each and every one of you!

 * P.S. Barbara Brownyard has written a beautiful book on meditation:  https://www.amazon.com/Sitting-Silence-Barbara-Brownyard/dp/1973650002 

Worry Less Now; Gigi Langer

Gigi Langer has been sober 35 years, and holds a PhD in Psychological Studies in Education from Stanford University. Formerly crowned the “Queen of Worry,” Gigi resigned her post many years ago and now lives happily in Florida with her husband, Peter and her cat Murphy.

Worry Less Now Cover

My award-winning book, 50 Ways to Worry Less Now, describes how to reject the faulty thinking leading to addiction, dysfunctional relationships, perfectionism, and worry about loved ones. Check out the practical directions, personal stories, and other helpful growth tools. Amazon: 4.8 stars (Buy Discounted Paperback, e-book, OR audiobook HERE)

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