Gigi Langer

Worry Less Now!

Ā Love More Now!

Are You Stuck? Four Strategies to Get Unstuck

stop fear and doubt, worry less now

For the past few weeks Iā€™ve felt stuck in fear and doubt. Ā Iā€™ve written a new bookĀ because I wanted to share the tools that helped me face and grow through life challenges such as addiction, divorce, chronic pain, perfectionism, and co-dependence.Ā Ā 

The book goes on sale in February, so it’s time to start promoting it.Ā Ā But I’m rather overwhelmed by the prospect.Ā Ā My mindā€™s (not-so-helpful) whispered lies chatter away: ā€œItā€™s too much work! Where do I start? Look how well other authors do it! Whatā€™s wrong with me?”

When such worries and negative thinking keep us stuck, how do we move forward? Today, I used four strategies to dissolve my fears and return to my happy, creative, productive self. It’s through struggles like this that I’ve discovered these tools.

1. Get Honest with Yourself. At first, my worries flew under the radar, coaxing me to eat sugary ā€œtreats,ā€ binge-watch TV, and oversleep. Fortunately, I no longer use drugs, alcohol, overwork, or sex to avoid my feelings. Those are all dead-ends that stop growth in its tracks.

So, my first step was to honestly admit to myself that my latest challenge had me rattled. Then I could practice self-compassion (http://KristinNeff.com), and clear away the shame. (After all, how many authors really do know how to market a book?).

I gain self-honesty most easily when I can share my struggles with healthy friends. Journaling helps too; when my fears are out on page, they donā€™t seem insurmountable. Quite often I pray or meditateā€”both help me feel that Iā€™m not alone and shrink my fears.

2. Claim Positive Power. Hereā€™s the step that many balk at: I admitted that my willpower wasn’t going to change anything.Ā  When I let go of my need for control and certainty, I can access a source of power greater than my fears.

My negative thinking told me I must try to figure out the magic formula that would make the book sell. Although itā€™s true that I do need to learn a lot, I donā€™t have to motivate myself with such fearful thoughts. My best inspiration and guidance come from a higher, wiser place.

You may be thinking, ā€œOh, man, here we go with that higher power stuff.ā€ Power and wisdom come from many sources and itā€™s up to you to find your own. You might use a variety of terms for this power: courage, God, universal truth, providence, true self, angelsā€”it doesnā€™t matter, as long as proves to be stronger than your fear.

Try reading and listening to words that inspire you. Then, just say to yourself, ā€œMaybe Iā€™ll try trusting a power greater than my fearful thinking.ā€ Thatā€™s all that’s necessary.

3. Choose Your Future. Even when Iā€™m stuck, I know what Iā€™d like to have happen. In this case, I wanted the marketing process to get the book into the hands and hearts of the people it will help.

When I was stuck, I didnā€™t believe this could happen, and I was resentful that it seemed so hard. My mind was so clogged with negativity and fear that little inspiration could enter it.

But I didn’t have to say there.Ā I set aside my worries and stated my goal; then I took actions to stream positive power into my body, mind, and spirit.

4. Use Growth Practices. First, I needed to reinstate my daily practices of reading inspiring writing, talking with supportive friends, meditating, and walking outdoors.Ā I had been lax for the past weeks; that’s why I found myself at the mercy of my fears and doubts.

Your own daily tools for achieving peace might differ, but they will always lower the volume of your worries and whispered lies.

Today I used tapping therapy, a few new chants, and a prayer to dissolve my negativity. As a result, I now trust that the right resources and inspired actions to successfully market my book are on their way. In fact, this article is my first creative action in a while. Whew!

When your own worries and doubts threaten your happiness and productivity, try these four strategies:

  • Honesty: ā€œHereā€™s whatā€™s going on inside me.ā€
  • Power: ā€œI claim courage and intuitive direction.ā€
  • Choices: ā€œThis is what I want and Iā€™m going for it!ā€
  • Growth Practices: ā€œIā€™m actively connecting with loving power.ā€

In my own and othersā€™ experience, these practices yield wonderful results:

  • Peace of Mind. Manage lifeā€™s challenges with calm, wisdom, hope, and gratitude.
  • Clarity. Fulfill your dreams without limitations.
  • Enjoy relationships that thrive and serve others.

worry , recovery, sanity

Gigi Langer, PhD. Ā Based on her work in psychology and personal experience inĀ therapy, recovery, and a variety of spiritual teachings, Gigi is a sought-after speaker, retreat leader, and award-winning writer and professor. Ā She has co-authored five other books for educators.

50 Ways to Worry Less NowĀ will be released inĀ early 2018.Ā  Learn more at https://gigilanger.com/new-book-worry-less-now/

Can A Course in Miracles Cure Your Worries?

A Course in Miracles BookHow Does A Course in Miracles Work?Ā 

I presented the ideas in this blog at a recent workshopĀ  in Ann Arbor, Michigan.Ā  If you’re a student of the Course, I’d love to receive your comments. If you’re new to it, you may find its teachings helpful to your personal growth. It has changed my life!

What is A Course in Miracles? (from Wikipedia)

The book,Ā A Course in Miracles (ACIM), consists of three sections entitled “Text”, “Workbook” and “Manual for Teachers.” Its purpose is to bring about a “spiritual transformation,”Ā  In 1965, Helen Schucman began working at a medical center as Bill Thetford’s research associate. When their weekly office meetings became quite contentious, Thetford concluded that “[t]here must be another way.” Schucman believed this interaction triggered a series of visions, dreams, and heightened imagery, along with an “inner voice” that told her: “This is a Course in Miracles, please take notes.” The next day, she explained her “note taking” to Thetford. To her surprise, Thetford encouraged her to continue the process. Schucman said that the writing made her very uncomfortable, though it never seriously occurred to her to stop. The transcription was completed in 1977. ACIM is published by the Foundation for Inner Peace in Novato, CA.

General Principles of ACIM :Ā Gigiā€™s Ideas (Workbook lesson # in parentheses)

A miracle is a shift in perception. We choose Godā€™s loving thoughts over egoā€™s fearful thoughts.Ā Ā We can align our minds with either Love or Fear.

  • Love: God. Spirit. The only reality. Everything that comes from love is good: e.g., peace, service, care.
  • Fear: The ego. Illusions. The part of the mind that knows only fear: judging, separating, attacking. God did not create the ego. It’s driven by bodily instincts for survival and competition. When people operate out of fear, it’s simply an appeal for help.

Who Am I, Really? ā€œWeā€™re spiritual beings living in a human body.ā€

  • I am a beloved child of God. I am spirit. (But Iā€™ve forgotten this.) (114)
  • I am not a body. I am free, for I am still as God created me. (201)
  • God is in my mind. My mind holds only what I think with God. (141)

Donā€™t Trust Egoā€™s Thoughts

Egoā€™s voice is the first one and the loudest one we hear.Ā It tells us happiness is not in God; that itā€™s in worldly people, places & things.

  • Iā€™m never upset for the reason I think. (5)
  • Iā€™m upset because I see something that isnā€™t there. (6)
  • I see only the past. (7) I have no neutral thoughts. (23)
  • The world I see holds nothing I want. (128)

ā€œItā€™s His/Her Fault!ā€

Weā€™re sinless in Godā€™s Eyes: We love ourselves & others because God does.Ā Fear (ego) separates us from our own spirit AND one another.

  • When people operate out of fear, it is simply an appeal for help.
  • What I see is a form of vengeance (attack/defense). (22)
  • My grievances hide the light of the world. (69)

Thereā€™s Only One of Us Here

What we see in another is what we believe about ourselves.Ā As we love and forgive others, we dissolve our sense of separation from GodĀ  Ā  Ā and our fellows. Weā€™re students and teachers to one other.

  • To give and receive are one in truth. (108)
  • All that I give is given to myself. (126)
  • Iā€™m not alone in experiencing the effects of my thoughts. (18)Ā Ā 

How to Escape Ego and Fear

Every time weā€™re disturbed, we need to reject egoā€™s negative Ā Ā  perceptions and ask God (Love) to help us see things differently.Ā There is no ā€œorder of difficultyā€ to either problems or miracles. They’re all the same: either misperceptions or the truth.

Ā I Want to Be Free of Egoā€™s Perceptions

  • I share Godā€™s will for happiness for me. (102)
  • I am not the victim of the world I see. (31)
  • The past is over. It can touch me not. (289)
  • I could see peace instead of this. (34)

I Choose Love over Fear

  • I am determined to see this differently. (21)
  • Let miracles replace all grievances. (78)
  • Let every voice but Godā€™s be still in me. (254)
  • I rest in God. (109)
  • Love is the way I walk in gratitude. (195)

Related Prayers

Third Step Prayer: God, I offer myself to Thee – To build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will. Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy Power, Thy Love, and Thy Way of life.Ā May I do Thy will always!

Seventh Step Prayer:Ā Ā My Creator, I am now willing that you should have all of me, good and bad. I pray that you now remove from me every single defect of character which stands in the way of my usefulness to you and my fellows. Grant me strength, as I go out from here, to do your bidding. Amen.

The Activity of God (J. Sig Paulson — Unity Church):Ā The activity of God is the only powerĀ at work in my mind, heart, and life.Ā All false beliefs, all negative appearancesĀ are dissolved right nowĀ by the loving, forgiving action of God. I am whole, strong, and free as God created me to be.

Want to Learn More?

Start with Marianne Williamson’s A Return to Love; Then get my friend, Karen Casey’s, two wonderful books, Daily Meditations for Practicing the Course andĀ 52 Ways to Live The Course in Miracles.Ā https://www.amazon.com/Karen-Casey/e/B001IGNGO2

gigilanger_worrylessnowGigi has studied ACIM since 1988. She now attends Course study groups in Michigan and Florida.Ā  Langer is a certified facilitator of Gerald Jampolskyā€™s Attitudinal Healing, a program that helps children and adults struggling with disease apply the ideas from ACIM.

Gigi Langer’s new book,Ā 50 Ways to Worry Less Now: Reject Negative Thinking to Find Peace, Clarity, and Connection,Ā is being published by Possum Hill Press in February, 2018.

Super Tools for Worry

Worry Less, positive thinking
Don’t Worry!

 

If youā€™re like me and sometimes worry about a challenge youā€™re facing, here are a few tools thatĀ  help me through it. I usually emerge free of fear and ready to enjoy life–stress-free!

First, Ā I get honest with myself that I’m a little rattled. (Quite often I try to deny how Iā€™m really feeling by trying to ā€œput on a good face”– even with myself!!)

Then I admit that fear has been in the driverā€™s seat of my mind and I invite aĀ  power bigger than my fear to take over my thinking. I often merely ask for help to see things differently.

Next, I choose to take the necessary actions to find peace of mind. This requires a commitment to my own happiness and serenity.

Finally, I apply growth tools to dissolve my worries so I can connect with wisdom and love. I persist in using tools such as a simple prayer, affirmation, or calling a healthy friend to share my concerns. Sometimes I use the app Insight TimerĀ to help me relax and trust that all is well.

Insight Timer is great; you can select guided meditations by the amount of time you have, person, or topic.Ā Ā I just used the one by Tara Brach to calm myself about the next phase in my book-writing adventure: Doing publicity, another whole new challenge!

Here’s the link to the app:Ā https://insighttimer.app.link/HQZbB2ezuF

Tara Brach’sĀ  15-minute meditation helped me access the courage, inspiration, and peace of mind to move forward with my project. Her wonderful books and other products are at www.tarabrach.com

I know that honesty, power, choices, and tools like these can help youĀ  connect with the power of your true selfā€”unfettered by fear, ego, and limitation. The sky’s the limit!

(PS: The advance reader copies of 50 Ways to Worry Less NowĀ will be printed next week! Check it out out https:// Gigilanger.com/new-book-worry-less-now/) Release date: March 2018…unless you subscribe (-:

Does Change Make You Worry? Step Back . . . Try Beauty!

Worry Less Now Blog: Beauty Trumps Worry

Change: Who likes it? No one does! I don’t either. Cuz it makes me worry! (What does this have to do with a hedgehog?? Stick with me here . . .)

Change always wakes up worry’sĀ whispered lies:Ā Ā “What if the change makes things worse? Don’t make the wrong choice. It could cost you!!”

We make a plan and proceed as if it’s in stone–but we know better, don’t we? At least those of us who’ve been around for a while. “Make the plan but hold it loosely.” That’s what I’ve learned over the years. Ā Still, when things change, it unsettles me; I need to step back to breathe and gain wisdom. Today, I’m stepping into quiet moments of beauty.

So, what’s the change that’s causing my worry? As happens so often in my life, the right person shows up at just the right time with (what seems to be) just the right advice. This latest info might require me change the release date of my book, 50 Ways to Worry Less Now. Ā https://gigilanger.com/new-book-worry-less-now/

A friend-of-a-friend, a very experienced publicist, suggests releasing the e-book and print book at same time, in late February or March.Ā I would print it right away and send out “advance reader” copies with letters requesting traditional media coverage ā€“- reviews, interviews, and so on– to generate ā€œbuzzā€ before the release date. In the meantime, I would continue social media marketing. As I read up on marketing (I’m a total novice, so I have to research these things), there seems to be consensus on this approach.

This new plan kinda breaks my heart, tho’. Ā I want to get the book into readersā€™ hands as soon as possible. Ā I’m pretty sure it’s gonna help a lot of people beat the worry habit. For now, only the beta readers will get it, as they’ve invested their time to provide feedback and deserve a little reward. But others won’t.

So, while Iā€™m stepping back to gain perspective before making this decision, I’m enjoying a bit of beauty by recalling one ofĀ my favorite books of all time:Ā The Elegance of the HedgehogĀ by Muriel Barbery. Stunning writing!Ā 

Hereā€™s a little poem I wrote in 2011 after reading it.

And What of Beauty? Ā by Gigi

If all is illusion, as many believe.

Then, what of this feast that greets us each day?

The luscious green summer,

The slinking grey body of my cat, Murphy,

Looked upon with a full, almost-bursting heart?

Is it that Beauty elicits Love?

And thus transcends the physical?

Is it a portal into Heaven and Peace?

I may never know

Art, however, has captured itself

When Muriel Barbery wrote,

ā€œIā€™ll be searching for those moments

of always within the never.

Beauty, in this world.ā€

As the rising notes of Satie rose up

Into that courtyard, Barberyā€™s character,

Realizing that she will never again see her dear friend, thinks,

ā€œThose strains of music created a sort of interlude in time,

Something suspended,

An elsewhere that had come to us,

An always within never.ā€

Beauty trumps Death.

Love trumps Pain.

Truth trumps Fear.

Gigi Langer, PhD. Ā With more than 35 years of experience in psychology, therapy, and recovery, Ā Gigi is a sought-after speaker on professional and personal growth. She is an award-winning writer, and has co-authored five other books. Ā Her latest book,Ā 50 Ways to Worry Less Now: Reject Negative Thinking to Find Peace, Clarity, and Connection, will be released soon.Ā