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Gigi Langer

Worry Less Now!

 Love More Now!

Author: Gigi Langer

Gigi Langer, PhD, wrote the award-winning "50 Ways to Worry Less Now: Reject Negative Thinking to Find Peace, Clarity, and Connection" (4.8 stars). She's a sought-after speaker and retreat leader who has helped thousands of people improve their lives at home and work. She can help improve yours too! An author of six books on personal and professional growth, she's the self-proclaimed "Queen of Worry" and speaks from experience.
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WHY IS THE “NOW” IN WORRY LESS NOW?

Some have asked why I added the “Nworry less now audiobook gigi Langerow” at the end of “50 Ways to Worry Less.” At first, I didn’t think much about it; it just seemed to have a better rhythm. But, as I’ve pondered it more deeply, I realize the word “now” clarifies a point that eludes many of us:

We don’t stop worrying all at once and forever. It’s a minute-by-minute process in each “now” moment.

So many believe if we could just find the one right answer, we could be forever free of fear and limitations. But that hasn’t been my experience. In fact, personal growth is a rather mysterious process. We work away in therapy and/or recovery, and often doubt that much is changing.

But, then we find little sparkles of light sprinkled along the way. It’s those illuminated “now” moments that signal we’re on the right path: a feeling of deep appreciation for a former enemy, a life-stopping moment of beauty, or acting courageously in situations that used to baffle us. Such miracle-moments show us that something bigger than our limitations is helping us become better people.

So, when I say we can “worry less NOW,” that’s exactly what I mean. Don’t be bothered by your worry a few minutes ago. Don’t go into the future and predict your problems will get worse. Just get quiet right now and remember who you are—a loving, loved, and loveable person guided by your own higher power (true self, universe, goddess, spirit, etc.).

This attention to the present moment is why meditation is so powerful: it teaches us to unhinge our attention from the details of the past and future, and to focus on what is happening right now. Meditators know how to observe their thoughts, and when they are disturbing refocus them onto the peace of right now.

This is truly the ONLY control we have over anything in our lives: what we choose to think about RIGHT NOW.

This skill, however, is one of progress, not perfection. My own mind often projects future scary scenarios that typically never happen. And so often, I’m not even aware of my mind’s focus…it’s just on autopilot, going wherever it goes. In spite of this tendency to “check out,” I can remember to check-in with myself, perhaps by noticing a tension in my jaw or shoulders. Then I can ask myself what thoughts might be prompting this fear, and replace them with loving ones.  

So how do you choose what to think about? It takes commitment to learn new, positive thoughts to replace the usual negative ones. That is one reason many of us read daily meditation books, or study daily lessons of ACIM, or learn specific prayers, mantras, or affirmations. We need a bank of positive ideas to use when we notice our worry-thoughts. One of my favorites is, “Help me to see this differently.” In this request, I’m acknowledging that I don’t like what my mind is picturing, and I want the light of the present moment to fill my mind instead.

For example, my sister recently had surgery, and I kept imagining I would lose her. I hated how I felt—jittery and full of panic. Once I acknowledged I was scaring myself with  my thoughts, I asked to see it differently. Then I repeated this phrase “all false beliefs, all negative appearances are dissolved right now by love.” I regained my peace of mind for that moment. Then when my mind reverted to worry, I noticed it, and returned to the beauty of right now.

I’D LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU: How do you redirect your thoughts into a pleasant and peaceful appreciation of Now?

Gigi Langer has been sober 35 years, and holds a PhD in Psychological Studies in Education from Stanford University. Formerly crowned the “Queen of Worry,” Gigi resigned her post many years ago and now lives happily in Florida with her husband, Peter and her cat Murphy.

gigi langer worry less now
WORRY LESS NOW GIGI LANGER
My award-winning book, 50 Ways to Worry Less Now, describes how to reject the faulty thinking leading to addiction, dysfunctional relationships, perfectionism, and worry about loved ones. Check out the practical directions, personal stories, and other helpful growth tools. Amazon: 4.8 stars (Buy Discounted Paperback, e-book, OR audiobook HERE)


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Fabulous New Magazine: HOLA SOBER!

I just LOVE this new FREE full-feature e-magazine–Hola Sober–for sober folks. 

And SURPRISE! The December edition includes Karen Laird’s interview with me! I met Karen last spring in my Worry Less Study Group, and she wrote this fabulous article about it. Thank you, Karen! 

Hola Sober is a fresh, colorful magazine focused on alcohol-free in a drink-drenched world, showcasing sober gold moments, offering inspirational stories, and motivating healthy wellness lifestyle choices.  It is a FREE magazine as the editor believes no one should have to pay for sober inspiration in 2021. 

Here’s the link to the December issue: Click HERE  (If it doesn’t work, you may need to subscribe, but it’s FREE!) Please subscribe HERE.

gigi langer worry less now

Gigi Langer has been sober 35 years, and holds a PhD in Psychological Studies in Education from Stanford University. Formerly crowned the “Queen of Worry,” Gigi resigned her post many years ago and now lives happily in Florida with her husband, Peter and her cat Murphy.

worry less now gigi langer

Gigi’s award-winning book, 50 Ways to Worry Less Now, describes how to correct the faulty thinking leading to addiction, dysfunctional relationships, perfectionism, and worry about loved ones. Check out the practical directions, personal stories, and other helpful growth tools. Amazon: 4.8 stars (Buy Discounted Paperback, e-book, OR audiobook HERE)

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WHEN LIFE IS SCARING THE S*** OUT OF US!

For the past two months, my dear Peter has been quite ill. You may remember that he’s my fourth husband, after many failures due to codependence and substance abuse. I’ve now had the blessing of 32 ½ happy years with a caring, responsible, and extremely fun partner.

   I love him dearly and am grateful for every day together. Don’t get me wrong, though; I haven’t made him into my higher power as I did with so many other men. No, I stand in the strength of spirit, and we hold hands as we meet life’s adventures together.
   So, in this latest adventure, we recently learned that Peter has significant heart disease; and then yesterday, he had all the signs of a heart attack! So went to the ER, and they kept him at the hospital overnight. YIKES!
     So, how do we handle things that are scaring the shit out of us? A well-worn statement from Alanon is: The more we talk about the problem, the less we focus on the solution. So, let’s get to the solutions:

  • focusing on love rather than fear,
  • not numbing my feelings, and
  • clinging to strong supportive friends.

Not Scaring Myself: Choosing Love 

Thank God, I recently signed up for Carol Howe’s short daily recordings of ACIM  (A Course in Miracles) lessons. ACIM teaches us over and over that our fearful, self-centered mind (ego) causes our upsets because it always “thinks” something is keeping us from getting what we want. For example, my fearful voice was crying, “Will I be left alone? Can I handle Peter’s declining health?”
   You can see these are all ego-questions about “me, myself, and I.” But these imaginings are only projections of past pain onto the future. They have nothing to do with the truth. 
My only path to peace is to reject the ego’s lies and focus on Love. So, I chose new thoughts: ”I will not see this situation through fear; I see it only through Love. Nothing can separate me from goodness; and the same goes for Peter. All is well.”

Staying Present with Support                                                          

During my tough times, I have two non-negotiables:

  1. I mustn’t consistently numb myself out with drugs, alcohol, food, shopping, or overactivity. I sure did eat a lot of sugar this week; and I’ve been known to veg out in front of movies to soften the blow of fear. But I don’t do this for long, and I continue my footwork. If I go for days with self-numbing and no positive self-care, I am in trouble and need help.
  2. I must reach out for support from friends on a similar growth path. This is not usually a family member or romantic interest; and it’s not someone who judges or tries to fix me. Most of my support buddies are healthy, sober women.

Your Prayers Rock!

So yesterday, I sent out a call for prayer and support from my recovery buddies, and WOW! did they ever pull through! I got so many sweet, comforting texts (Some who sent them are reading this, and I thank you SO much!)
      Here’s one example from my dear friend, Eileen, who sent this request to Rosary Circle, Carolyn Myss’ prayer community: 
“Please pray for Peter, the husband of my dear friend, Gigi. Peter has been ill for a couple of months with influenza B and was recently diagnosed with heart disease. Please visualize Peter eagerly learning about cardiovascular disease and embracing the dietary and lifestyle changes that will improve his health. Pray that he finds educational resources that fit his needs and budget, that he experiences hope and that he feels the love of family and friends. Bless Gigi as she supports Peter and bless his caregivers as they develop an effective and efficient plan to monitor and treat him. We gratefully anticipate Peter’s return to health that he may use his life to serve you.”   Thank you, thank you, thank you. It is done!   

The Good News

Tonight we came home from the ER with a good report: Altho’ Peter has heart disease, he has not had a heart attack, and he passed the stress test quite well! (He does still have Influenza B even though we had flu shots). But, there is so much to be grateful for.
    I am so glad I’ve learned to keep my serenity bank full by praying, meditating, and joining with my friends in AA, Alanon, and ACIM. When the scary times hit, I can call on that reserve to help us through it with trust and calm. 

Worry Less Now; Gigi Langer

Gigi Langer has been sober 35 years, and holds a PhD in Psychological Studies in Education from Stanford University. Formerly crowned the “Queen of Worry,” Gigi resigned her post many years ago and now lives happily in Florida with her husband, Peter and her cat Murphy.

Worry Less Now Cover

Gigi’s award-winning book, 50 Ways to Worry Less Now, describes how to correct the faulty thinking leading to addiction, dysfunctional relationships, perfectionism, and worry about loved ones. Check out the practical directions, personal stories, and other helpful growth tools. Amazon: 4.8 stars (Buy Discounted Paperback, e-book, OR audiobook HERE)

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THE DIVINE SPARK!

Happiness comes from the divine spark within each of us.

“Many of us mistakenly think happiness comes from outside ourselves. For example, when other people shower us with love, we’re happy . . . On the other hand, relying on our inner wisdom to tell us we’re worthy and believing we are worthy . . . [require] only a simple change in perspective. It’s looking within, not without, for knowledge of our worth. There’s no mystery to it. “  from A Life of My Own by Karen Casey


Karen Casey is one of my favorite writers. When I got sober, her daily meditation book, Each Day a New Beginning (Hazelden), saved my life by putting healthy, hopeful thoughts into my mind. And, did I ever need them!

I had grown up totally unaware of the pure goodness that I had inside me. It was covered up by sadness, feeling less than others, a sense of insecurity, guilt from my crazy home-life, and shame over my sexual behavior.

Looking in All the Wrong Places

I was constantly seeking something outside of myself to fill up the hole of insecurity gnawing inside me. Unaware of my true worth, I tried to imitate others who seemed happy. I copied their “outsides,” hoping I could fix my “insides.” I pretended to be to be smart, well-mannered, friendly, and happy–I was willing to do anything for love and acceptance. 

But none of it really worked; it left me frustrated, alone, and enraged (even though it took years to admit it). When I discovered that booze and marijuana could erase the pain of life, I was quite relieved–but only temporarily.

Eventually, even that didn’t work. My failed relationships and divorces piled up at the same rate as my degrees. When I realized how broken I was, I finally sought help. 

The Solutions

As I walked through the doors of my first 12-step meeting, I could feel people responding to me as if I was already worthy of love. Although I couldn’t really believe it, I clung desperately to that possibility.

Over time, I followed their suggestions, found a sponsor who loved and guided me, and awoke to the divine spark of love within (and surrounding me). It’s now been over 35 years since I walked into that first meeting, and it has given me everything I have ever wanted. 

Worry Less Now; Gigi Langer

Gigi Langer has been sober 35 years, and holds a PhD in Psychological Studies in Education from Stanford University. Formerly crowned the “Queen of Worry,” Gigi resigned her post many years ago and now lives happily in Florida with her husband, Peter and her cat Murphy.

Worry Less Now Cover

Gigi’s award-winning book, 50 Ways to Worry Less Now, describes how to correct the faulty thinking leading to addiction, dysfunctional relationships, perfectionism, and worry about loved ones. Check out the practical directions, personal stories, and other helpful growth tools. Amazon: 4.8 stars (Buy Discounted Paperback, e-book, OR audiobook HERE)

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