DO THE 12 STEPS OF AA WORK?

Welcome to my second post about recovering from alcoholism and other substance abuse disorders. This series of blogs describe how you can recover from dependence on alcohol or other harmful habits. Here we will consider the 12 Steps of AA.

I hope you find the examples, guidelines, and stories helpful to your recovery from whatever is eating away at your ability to freely give and receive love. Also see my podcasts about recovery on YouTube and at www.GigiLanger.com.

What is AA?

AA began in 1935 when two men in Akron, Ohio were searching for a way to stay sober. They were able to do so by forming a support group and developing the Twelve Steps. The AA model, open to all and free, has spread around the globe, and AA now boasts over two million members in 180 nations and more than 118,000 groups.

The Twelve Steps have been applied to a variety of addictions. Groups exist for people struggling with codependency, overeating, gambling, narcotics, crystal meth, marijuana, self-injury, sex, emotions, and incest.

Each group uses the same Twelve Steps from AA, but with a single change: In Step 1, the word “alcohol” is typically replaced with the name of the addiction treated. Finally, the only requirement for attending Twelve-Step meetings is the desire to stop your addiction(s).

Does AA Really Work?

An extensive Stanford research review found AA to be more effective in promoting sobriety than other interventions or no intervention. One study found AA was 60 percent more effective, and another showed that AA and Twelve-Step counseling reduced mental health costs by $10,000 per person. The findings were consistent whether participants were young, elderly, male, female, veterans, civilians, or from outside the USA.

But You Can’t Do It Alone

Don’t try to kill your pain. Share it with another. When you lighten your burden and discover the jewels and joy alive beneath the pain, later you’ll be present for others who are suffering. —Cuong and Lu

As I’ve said time and time again, we can’t change our lives all by ourselves. We need others who have gone before us, people who have learned to take life “uncut” with patience, tolerance, and courage. With understanding and help from others, we learn how to face our unpleasant feelings head-on, without the need to deny them.

I was a loner before I admitted my alcoholism, so I understand how difficult it can be to find such friends. If you’re a loner too, I encourage you to be open-minded and keep searching for support. Even one emotionally healthy person is enough for now, perhaps a friend or therapist.

Connecting with recovering people helps in several ways:

1. It’s easier to be honest with yourself when you’re around people who openly share their personal struggles and victories. As you listen, you can tune into your feelings and uncover some of your own whispered lies.
2. With such friends, you can find self-acceptance and hope that may elude you when you’re alone. As others describe their lives before recovery, you begin to realize you’re not the only one who has done horrible things, and that you too can overcome your problems.
3. You’ll often find subtle guidance through others. As people tell their stories, you might hear just the words you need. In turn, you may hear yourself saying things that are helpful not only to your sober friends but also to yourself.
4. Finally, we have amazingly bad memories. For any new way of life to stick, we need constant reminders of the key principles and tools of recovery.

If you decide to attend Twelve-Step meetings regularly, you’ll find the right recovering buddies, plus a sponsor to guide you through the Steps. Please just keep showing up.

I still attend meetings and work the Steps today, even after more than thirty years of continuous sobriety. Why? Because they keep me connected with Love, and I get to see the most amazing personal transformations from a front-row seat.