Gigi Langer

Worry Less Now!

 Love More Now!

Attitudinal Healing Principle 4: Let Go of The Past And Future

My latest book “Love More Now,” is greatly inspired by A Course in Miracles and Jerry Jampolsky’s Attitudinal Healing. It’s a pretty simple recipe for peace of mind: CHOOSE LOVE (an open heart) OVER FEAR (a closed heart). Two major sources of fear are thoughts about the past and future.

What is Attitudinal Healing?

Jerry Jampolsky, one of the early readers of A Course in Miracles, simplified its complex lessons into the 12 Principles of Attitudinal Healing (AH). AH groups have grown into a worldwide service that can be applied to almost any difficulty. 

The 12 Principles of Attitudinal Healing
1. The Essence Of Our Being Is Love
2. Health Is Inner Peace, Healing Is Letting Go Of Fear
3. Giving And Receiving Are The Same
4. We Can Let Go Of The Past And Future
5. Now Is The Only Time There Is And Each Instant Is For Giving
6. We Can Learn To Love Ourselves And Others By Forgiving Rather Than Judging
7. We Can Become Love Finders Rather Than Fault-Finders
8. We Can Choose And Direct Ourselves To Be Peaceful Inside Regardless Of What Is Happening Outside
9. We Are Students And Teachers To Each Other
10. We Can Focus On The Whole Of Life Rather Than The Fragments
11. Since Love Is Eternal, Death Need Not Be Viewed As Fearful
12. We Can Always Perceive Others As Either Loving Or Fearful And Giving A Call Of Help For Love

In past blogs, I summarized
Principle 1. The Essence of our Being is Love, and Love is Eternal., 
Principle 2. Health Is Inner Peace, Healing Is Letting Go Of Fear, and 
Principle 3. Giving Is the Same As Receiving.

Principle 4. We Can Let Go Of The Past And Of The Future

The past is there for our learning. All of our experiences are valuable ones and add to our growth, if we choose to view it that way. Things that we have done that we label as “wrong” are merely experiences for us to learn from and build upon. It does not serve us, however, to dwell on the past. Things like “if only I had done this or that” or “I wish it were different” only serve to hinder us.
    The fact is that we are in the present and we need to deal with what is going on NOW. This, again, is done by retraining our minds to stay aware and alert. It is so easy to slip into either the past or the future, but we are not truly alive unless we are living in the present moment. The future can be exciting or scary, depending on what is going on in our lives. We can dwell on the anxieties of the future all we want, but it surely does not give us peace.
    There is an important distinction here. All this doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t make plans for our future. Of course, that is important. The distinction is that while we are making plans for the future, our consciousness remains in the present.     
  We can’t foresee the future, so it isn’t productive to dwell on what may or may not happen. We can only set our intentions for the future, like making reservations, and then take steps to make them happen when they actually manifest and become the present.
    The important aspect of this Principle is that we can elect to change past thoughts that are not beneficial, or that are hurtful. To do this, it is important to become aware of them, and then make a conscious decision to let them go. If they come back again, we just repeat the process. Every time something comes up that we don’t want to hang onto, we can make a fresh decision to erase the tape.
    One of the concepts that is particularly valuable in Attitudinal healing is “My mind can change all thoughts that hurt.” This is a powerful tool if we want to change our perceptions and create a new reality.

More About Attitudinal Healing
You can easily find Attitudinal Healing groups by searching in your area. They are helpful for anyone who is struggling with any life situation. Many years ago, I joined my mentor, Jane, in California to become a facilitator for Attitudinal Healing groups. What a wonderful experience. Plus, I got to meet the late Jerry Jampolsky

Source material: Love is Letting Go of Fear, by Jerry Jampolsky and AH Review Principles Booklet

Love More Now: Facing Life’s Challenges with an Open Heart is now available from Amazon HERE or Barnes and Noble HERE. PAPERBACK ($9.99) E-BOOK ($4.99) These low prices last through April, so get your copy now!
Thank you for helping readers find Love More Now by POSTING a REVIEW on Amazon.

Gigi Langer has been sober 37 years, and holds a PhD in Psychological Studies in Education from Stanford University. Formerly crowned the “Queen of Worry,” Gigi resigned her post many years ago and now lives happily in Florida with her husband, Peter and her cat, Easter.

gigi langer worry less now

Giving Is the Same as Receiving

give to others worry less now

Giving and Receiving Are the Same

In my recent blog posts and newsletters I’ve been introducing the principles of Attitudinal Healing (AH).  Jerry Jampolsky, one of the early readers of A Course in Miracles, simplified its complex lessons into the 12 Principles of Attitudinal Healing. As a child and adult psychiatrist, he first began applying them with children facing terminal illness. Soon the AH groups grew into a worldwide service that can be applied to almost any difficulty. Today, we consider Principle 3

In Jampolsky’s book, Teach Only Love, he gives this explanation: “When our attention is on giving and joining with others, fear is removed and we accept healing for ourselves.”

So, How Do We Do It?

There are many people in this world who are labeled givers. Givers usually have a hard time learning how to receive.

There are also receivers, who are great at receiving but don’t really know how to give.

Givers are usually rescuers who manipulate the other person. If the person doesn’t respond to their expectations they are disappointed.

The receiver, on the other hand, makes many demands on another and never seems to get his or her needs met.

Both look to the external world to fulfill their needs, and both tend to have emptiness inside.

The Attitudinal Healing definition of giving and receiving comes from another place. It is egoless. There are no conditions, no expectations, and no boundaries put on the extension of people sharing love.

When we have no goal or desire to change another person, or no need to get anything from them, a different dynamic takes place. We are actually only there for that person in an egoless way, and we can start to feel a sense of inner peace.

As we begin to feel a sense of joining with another
person, we seem to forget about ourselves. We become less concerned about our own feelings as we extend and expand. It is at this point that one feels the gift of giving and receiving becoming one. The supply is endless, and we become more and more full.

Where Does It Happen?

This kind of interaction takes place in the AH groups–a safe place for people to extend themselves towards others. They are able to forget their self-consciousness and through this become empowered with love to be able to reach out toward another without expecting something in return. At this point the person who is being helped almost automatically can let go of fears or anxieties and become one with those in the room.

When people are truly operating in this mode, fears are released and healing begins to take place.

(Source: Definition of  the Principles of Attitudinal Healing)

Love More Now: Facing Life’s Challenges with an Open Heart is now available from Amazon HERE or Barnes and Noble HERE. PAPERBACK ($9.99) E-BOOK ($4.99) These low prices last through April, so get your copy now!
Thank you for helping readers find Love More Now by POSTING a REVIEW on Amazon.

Gigi Langer has been sober 37 years, and holds a PhD in Psychological Studies in Education from Stanford University. Formerly crowned the “Queen of Worry,” Gigi resigned her post many years ago and now lives happily in Florida with her husband, Peter and her cat, Easter.

gigi langer worry less now

FROM HARRIET HUNTER: “NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS”

THANK YOU TO MY DEAR FRIEND, HARRIET, FOR ALLOWING ME TO PRESENT HER FABULOUS ARTICLE, “New Year Resolutions.” Read on to get a taste of Harriet’s humor, wisdom, and inspiration. The “Collector’s Edition of Miracles of Recovery” and Harriet’s other books are available HERE. https://amzn.to/3W88R3W

“Before sobriety, New Year’s resolutions were a lot like not picking up a drink. Or drug!  I would SWEAR each morning I could get through the day, AND I DID!

But I couldn’t get through the night. Nighttime would come (or just the thought of night coming on would be enough to send my nerves into a panic), and I’d tell my family, “Ooops, I’ve forgotten something!” and out I’d go.

“There was never a time when I could not be without my best friend who was always there for me. Without fail.

“And so came the failure of everything else that I wanted to do.

“Each New Year’s Eve I’d make my faithful resolutions. You know the drill: I was going to QUIT drinking followed by quitting drinking beginning the next day. These two were always at the top of my list.  But I think deep down I knew it was a joke. It was the closest to not drinking I could get.

“Fast Forward. Now, 23 years clean and sober, my intentions and statements about what is true for me have taken on a stronger, deliberate meaning.

I’d like to share a few things with you that continue to work for me.

Give up the Ghost of Failure

I needed to Stop. Kidding. Myself: I was going to be a complete looser for the REST of my life if I didn’t give up the Ghost of Failure. I never had a prayer of succeeding at anything, because, I told myself, I was too undisciplined. I hurt too many people and was no longer redeemable. This was the set-up I needed to fail yet again!!

And it worked for me for a lifetime.

a woman with arms stretched out

The key concept here is to, â€œListen to The Words You Use Against Yourself.” Nothing will assure your success more than when you tell yourself a thousand times that â€œI Am a Winner and I CAN and WILL do this.” 

Wayne Dwyer, Ph.D., said, “If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.”

In the story, “Acceptance Was the Answer” on page 420 of the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous the author shares Dr. Dyer’s philosophy here with, “I MUST keep my magic magnifying mind on my acceptance and off my expectations…”

When we “accept” a situation and move that specific situation from our head to our heart, we have become convinced we can accomplish our goal because we’ve made it a part of who we are. We are positively convinced, absolutely certain now, we can do this, and we do! Does this happen with one thought, or one try? Typically, not.

We expand the possibility of our success by making our resolutions non-negotiable so we cannot fail.

This one solitary ACT of turning failure into success starts to unfold around us and with repetition, belief in ourselves and continual expanding of these thoughts, we begin to bloom find hope in our hard-fought accomplishment.

What we focus on, becomes us, because it has moved into the ranks of our critical thinking. We have become CERTAIN it is what we want to do and we DO it!!  Continued action, as if at the gym, strengthens this resolve and tenacity.

And we succeed! Failure now is a thing of the past because we’ve changed the way we’ve look at the thing we want to conquer!

Success begins and ends with us, but we must first believe it possible, But before we’re able to do that, we have to WANT it more than anything. In much the same way we want our sobriety.

Develop Ten (10) Intentions (Resolutions) to Achieve in 2023

The first five must be achievable, attainable with a little effort on your part. And we do them!

The next five, however, are the more involved, consequential and life-changing intentions. You must be honest about how much you want to achieve them, so prioritize as you go. Determine how achievable they are but do it!  In other words, if you intend to lose 25 pounds, begin your first book or find a new job writing these words down are not enough. In fact—don’t commit them to paper at all unless and until you’ve determined the importance and consequence of each. Because once we commit them to paper and prioritize them, we begin to allocate precious energy, emotionalism, prayers and forward motion to them whether you know it or not.

What are you willing to do differently?

This is the definition of life-altering propositions, and one of the greatest demonstrations of those who succeed. We already know that if nothing changes, well—nothing changes!

‘Differently’ doesn’t have to be huge, because it is most often found in our thinking. To do things ‘differently’ is to outline a mental plan of success. It may or may not include prayer, waking up earlier, the process might be a combination of large and small changes, but changes they are. It is this hula-hoop of changes we make to do a specific situation differently that moves us from our old ‘failure’ of thinking, to new behavior of a ‘success,’ because preparation, thought and the value we attach to this new intention is the difference between failing and succeeding.

What are you truly made of, and what lengths are you willing to go to, to achieve your resolutions?

This answer requires honest reflections on subjects like procrastination, whether or not you have the sustainability inside necessary to carry it out, and what the payoff will be to go through with this intention?

If we want success, then we must set ourselves UP to experience that success differently than we’ve done in the past.

Oftentimes, in order for this new behavior or action to be achieved, it must be part of your daily thinking. It may involve how you ‘see’ yourself, moving closer to your success just for today, taking small steps as the elephant, but making strong strides with each forward motion. It may require adding a special mantra, verse, prayer to your daily life.

Whatever it involves, if you make it exciting, thorough and a part of your daily thinking, you cannot fail. Because you’ve already ‘expanded’ the energy associated with your resolution so much it is now a part of who you are!

Lastly, whatever your Big Five might be—be sure to seek out your passion associated with each of these and have faith that they wouldn’t be on your list without this passion. USE that passion, that excitement and positivity to work with you as you begin tackling one at a time as prioritized. Of course, you’ll rearrange them as the year moves forward, but we can only DO one at a time! ~  Anything more and we lose focus and forward momentum and become overwhelmed.

Blessings to each of this New Year with the allotment of another 365 days to become increasingly creative with our time, with ourselves, and learn by reaching and collaborating with others how they’ve done it.


If you’d like to see all of the books from Harriet, visit https://amzn.to/3W88R3W. Her new Collector’s Edition of Miracles of Recovery is at the bottom of the page.

LINK TO FULL BLOG: https://harriethunter.org/alcohol-and-drug-addiction-considering-your-new-years-intentions/

Gigi’s a newest book describes how to dissolve the blockages that close our hearts to loving ourselves and others. Learn to open access to the Loving Energy of your True Self. Find the wisdom and courage to face and resolve relationship difficulties, perfectionism, illness, and worry about loved ones (among others).  Due on Amazon, mid-February, 2023.

Gigi Langer has been sober over 35 years, and holds a PhD in Psychological Studies in Education from Stanford University. Formerly crowned the “Queen of Worry,” Gigi resigned her post many years ago and now lives happily in Florida with her husband, Peter and her cat, Easter.

gigi langer worry less now
worry less now gigi langer

Gigi’s award-winning book, 50 Ways to Worry Less Now, describes how to correct the faulty thinking leading to addiction, dysfunctional relationships, perfectionism, and worry about loved ones. Check out the practical directions, personal stories, and other helpful growth tools. Amazon: 4.8 stars (Buy Discounted, personally signed Paperback with free Workbook PDF HERE $8.95 free US shipping.)

MEET SAM RAFOSS and Watch Our Video!

I loved talking with Sam this week on her YouTube channel about our experiences in recovery. Such an interesting woman! Take a moment to watch our YouTube video below. In the meantime, read on for more about the wonderful Sam!

https://youtu.be/itub5HpfxmQ

Sam Rafoss is the Founder & CEO of Sober and Serene where she invites you to stop drinking, get healthy, and take control of your life. Her services include an amazing YouTube channel, coaching, mentoring, and private discovery sessions. Find out more about her work HERE. 

Here are a few words from Sam:
I’ve been a holistic entrepreneur for over 20 years and sober for two years. My whole life I’ve been dedicated to healthy living and embracing the mind, spirit, body connection.  

Since I was this spiritually evolved health nut, I didn’t realize how addicted to wine I’d become until I tried to quit. Embracing a 30-day alcohol-free experiment early in 2020 transformed my life. It is clear to me how much better my life is without trying to moderate my daily wine habit. 

Sober and Serene is my legacy mission to help people embrace sobriety, get healthy and take control of their life. Many people question their relationship with alcohol and the impact it has on their life. If you are sober curious and looking for someone who can relate to what you’re going through, please reach out. Schedule your free discovery session to find out how I can help you.

My clients tend to be conscious high achievers who struggle with over drinking, overeating, anxiety and self-doubt: who want to explore sobriety, eat healthier, sleep better, grow spiritually and gain clarity, confidence and courage.

Contact Sam at: samrafoss@protonmail.com  or Call her at WhatsApp  587-582-8519

https://youtu.be/itub5HpfxmQ

Gigi Langer has been sober 35 years, and holds a PhD in Psychological Studies in Education from Stanford University. Formerly crowned the “Queen of Worry,” Gigi resigned her post many years ago and now lives happily in Florida with her husband, Peter and her cat, Easter.

gigi langer worry less now
worry less now gigi langer

Gigi’s award-winning book, 50 Ways to Worry Less Now, describes how to correct the faulty thinking leading to addiction, dysfunctional relationships, perfectionism, and worry about loved ones. Check out the practical directions, personal stories, and other helpful growth tools. Amazon: 4.8 stars (Buy Discounted, personally signed Paperback with free Workbook PDF HERE)