In recovery we’re asked to abandon our old guides and follow the will of our higher power.
At first it seems impossible: How in the world can I know God’s will for me?
Perhaps this is the wrong question.
We need only “figure out” one thing: how to recognize and reject our old guides: self-deception, dishonesty, selfishness, fear, and resentments. These motives led us to use others for our own gain, to dull our best selves, and withhold love not only from others but from ourselves.
Once we reject our old ways, we open ourselves to a power greater than ourselves. Think of this “higher power” as our deepest loving sense of what is right at any given moment. We need only suspend our fearful thinking and follow the lead of this loving wisdom. That’s it! Simple, but not easy, right?
How We Change
AA’s set of 12 steps, practiced over time with caring mentors, gives us a completely new direction. Following this path transforms our self-centered life into one of care, gratitude, and generosity.
At first, we find our new guidance from meetings: Don’t think, don’t drink, and go to meetings. God’s will, not my will. This too shall pass. Surrender to win. As our new sober friends share the miracles in their lives–not the least of which is quitting drinking and drugging–they give all the credit to a mysterious “power greater than myself.”
Throughout our recovery, we join voices in the Serenity prayer—an easy one to accept. But, at the end of meetings, we often say the Lord’s prayer—a much tougher sell for me. At first, the male image of a higher power just didn’t feel safe. But I stuck with it because the Third step said I could understand this power in my own way.
How Do We Follow A Higher Power?
Slowly, these new ideas seeped into my heart, replacing my selfish ways with loving guidance. When I found an image of an angelic girl in a flowing robe, walking with folded hands, my heart immediately opened to her as my loving guide. As I’ve studied other wisdom traditions, I’ve accepted other names for this power; for me, they are all the same loving presence.
Today, as I was listening to Carol Howe explain A Course in Miracles Lesson 155 (“I will step back and let love God/lead the way”), I saw myself following beautiful flowing presence of that first image. I held her hand as she led me along her unerring path to God’s love. Indeed, I prefer to live each moment this way: not looking too far ahead, just being in the present knowing that the next steps in my life are perfectly guided by loving power.
Now, I must admit I often allow fear’s voice to hide the truth of this conscious connection. Eventually, however, I notice I’ve lost my serenity, and I consciously grab the hand of my dear, sweet guides. The more I practice this connection, the less I go off track because my mind is filled with love, whether I’m aware of it or not.
Decide to Follow a Guide to a Better Life
So, how do we know God’s will for us? We honestly open ourselves to new ways of thinking. We get quiet and listen for wisdom. When we act from loving motives (care, kindness, comfort, self-compassion), I believe we make God smile and say, There they are, giving and receiving love just as I hoped they would.
I’D LOVE TO HEAR HOW YOU CONNECT WITH YOUR HIGHER POWER!
Gigi Langer has been sober 35 years, and holds a PhD in Psychological Studies in Education from Stanford University. Formerly crowned the “Queen of Worry,” Gigi resigned her post many years ago and now lives happily in Florida with her husband, Peter and her cat Murphy.
Gigi’s award-winning book, 50 Ways to Worry Less Now, describes how to correct the faulty thinking leading to addiction, dysfunctional relationships, perfectionism, and worry about loved ones. Check out the practical directions, personal stories, and other helpful growth tools. Amazon: 4.8 stars (Buy Discounted, personally signed Paperback with free Workbook PDF HERE)
ow” at the end of “50 Ways to Worry Less.” At first, I didn’t think much about it; it just seemed to have a better rhythm. But, as I’ve pondered it more deeply, I realize the word “now” clarifies a point that eludes many of us: