As you work at opening your heart, you may doubt that much is changing. The good times sometimes feel rare amidst the challenges. But as you press on, you’ll discover little, almost random, miracles of light, of insight, of peace. Such illuminated moments—similar to mine at Jenny Lake—tell you that you’re on the right path. For example, you might feel deep appreciation for a former enemy, witness a life-stopping moment of beauty, or act courageously in a situation that used to baffle you.
Such glimmers prove that your True Self is there, and it’s bigger and wiser than your fears. We all can grow into the person we hope to be. I know this because I and many others have learned how to dissolve the fears blocking our hearts and live from the power of our True Selves. I offer you the following examples of my life challenges. Although they temporarily stopped me in my tracks, I found ways to open my heart and walk through them with peace of mind and courage.
–Relationship failures. After couples therapy, I divorced my third husband, convinced I could never be happily married. A year later, I met Peter, the man of my dreams. Terrified of repeating my pattern of making a man the center of my life, I allowed myself to see him only twice a week. With therapy and supportive, female friends, my heart opened to the possibility of a healthy relationship. Peter and I recently celebrated over thirty years of happy, harmonious marriage.
–Worry about loved ones. When my dear friend battled cancer and, later, my fourth husband resumed drinking alcohol, my desire to control others tortured me. No matter what I did, nothing changed, other than my anxiety. Over time I discovered that my sense of security came not from their well-being, but from the Loving Energy of my True Self.
–Overwork and perfectionism. As a college professor, I wrestled with fierce professional jealousies, along with a tendency toward overwork and perfectionism. I constantly sought a sense of security through my achievements. Eventually, I learned how to open my heart to others and allow Loving Energy (rather than fear) to lead my efforts. It’s one reason I’ve been able to write this book and 50 Ways to Worry Less Now. An open, loving heart is a wonderful creative partner!
–Dysfunctional family and trauma. I suffered from many of the characteristics found in children of alcoholic parents: heart-closing anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem. I also discovered memories of early abuse, healed its wounds, and forgave those who had harmed me. The healing power of Loving Energy released me from a lifetime of worry about my safety and security.
–Poor health and illness. I struggled with back pain for fifteen years. Then both of my shoulders “froze” for two merciless years. With powerful tools to stream Love into my pain (for example, visualization and meditation), I finally recovered. I’m now free of limitations and in excellent health.
–Isolation and loneliness. Instead of trying to live as an island of self-sufficiency, I now enjoy the Love and care of women who keep my heart open and full. I know in my gut they will have my back, even if the worst of the worst happens. And I will do the same for them.
–Alcohol and drug dependence. For many years, marijuana and alcohol were ruining my relationships and inhibiting my power. I’ve now been clean and sober for over three decades and have helped (and been helped by) hundreds of women recovering from alcohol and drug addiction.
Although your own challenges may be different from those mentioned here, I know you too can access the loving power and wisdom of your True Self. After practicing this way of living, you’ll find that, no matter what life throws at you, you can dissolve your fears and frustrations to find a peaceful, courageous way through it.
** If you want an advance PDF so you can post a review on Amazon in February, please email me glanger2202@gmail.com **
Gigi Langer has been sober over 35 years, and holds a PhD in Psychological Studies in Education from Stanford University. Formerly crowned the “Queen of Worry,” Gigi resigned her post many years ago and now lives happily in Florida with her husband, Peter and her cat, Easter.
Gigi’s award-winning book, 50 Ways to Worry Less Now, describes how to correct the faulty thinking leading to addiction, dysfunctional relationships, perfectionism, and worry about loved ones. Check out the practical directions, personal stories, and other helpful growth tools. Amazon: 4.8 stars (Buy Discounted, personally signed Paperback with free Workbook PDF HERE $8.95 free US shipping.)